Anxiety about things that haven’t even happened…

    I don’t know where my anxiety came from, or why I can’t seem to make it go away for good. Some days I am ok, some days I literally feel my heart beating out of my chest. If you suffer anxiety, you know the annoyance, and the negativity it brings on a daily basis. The worst kind of anxiety that I deal with is the anxiety about something that hasn’t even happened yet. The great unknown of what our future has in store for me.. 

   Death of a loved one: Call me crazy, call me paranoid, call me what you will. I know it isn’t normal, yet I can’t shed the thoughts. It’s been a very long time since death has been close to me. From time to time I stumble upon the idea of someone I love passing away, and I instantly have a mental breakdown. It will happen randomly, before bed, at work, in the car. It’s important to accept the idea that these bad things happen, and it’s a part of life, but it’s not ok to worry if you don’t have to. Remember how happy you are in your current state of life, and that the people you’re worried about are just fine, and love you very much. If you suffer with these thoughts just calm yourself down by talking to someone you love, and tell yourself everything is fine. 

   Failing at a new job or current job: This one is also something that comes to mind often. The constant thoughts like, “what if I mess this up and lose my job” , “what if I don’t get the position I want?” Stop second guessing yourself. First of all, if we got the job, we are qualified and they like us, so why worry if nothing happened yet? And, if you don’t get the job, that doesn’t mean you are a failure, it just means to keep pushing yourself to new levels. Stressing about these situations are only going to cause more unnecessary unhappiness in our lives. Throughout our lives we will be given so many opportunities to become what we want, so if doesn’t come right away, we still have time. 

   Losing a relationship with someone: Whether it is a friend, or an intimate partner, it is common for someone with anxiety, like myself to panic about the relationships ending. Most often it is for no reason at all. “What if they are losing interest in me?” “What if I don’t make them happy?” Chances are if they are with you, they like you, and if your friends haven’t mentioned anything you are fine. If these thoughts pop into your head, communicate them with the people you are worried about. Tell them you love them, and it will help reassure you that you are indeed just fine. 

   Becoming unsuccessful: We have our entire lives to choose what we want to do with it, yet I manage to think of all the horrific outcomes of what I become. “What if I don’t find a career?” “What if I am broke?” “What if I don’t make a difference?” Bottom line is, we will not know who or what we become, until it happens. All that is important to thinks out is are you a good person? Do you have good morals, and ethics? Are you doing the things that make you happy? If you are worried of not becoming a successful person, then take the steps that will get you closer to it. Don’t worry about the future you, because it is all dependent on the present you. 

   The lists can go on and on with an anxiety sufferer like myself, and if you are similar it’s important to understand that worrying about situations that have no need to worry, are most likely just fine. Don’t let your mind make up stories in your head, because escaping them is very hard. Just remember to tell the people in your life that you love them, and always remember to live in the present, not the future. We don’t know for sure what is going to happen, and if we try to see the positivity in it rather than the scary unknown, we will likely be much happier.